The Tyranny of Indistinguishability, by Kassiane (Neurodivergent K blog).
‘Indistinguishability isn’t a moment … It is an unending job, and it gets more and more complex as you age. If there is anything I learned from How To Be A Real Person In 1000 Data Sheets, it’s that hiding is essential. Being noticed is the end of the world. Indistinguishability is tyrannical, because once you achieve it, it is the goal of every moment-to not be distinguished. That is no way to live a life. That actually isn’t a good goal at all. If the best prognosis you can possibly get is “will spend life hiding and exhausted”, you need to rethink your plans for that individual. Hiding is no way to live.’